I have always thought myself to be a firm Mum. Well at least that is what I would hope. I don't want to be the nasty Hitler Mum, but for my children to know that what Mum says, goes, and when I am mad, then its a bad thing, hehe. I guess I just don't want to be a pushover. I want my childrent to speak nicely to me, and most importantly , others. I want them to use their manners, all the time, and there is no telling me what to do, I am the boss, and they have to know that!
Sounds easy enough? Pffft yeah right!
I have lost count the amount of times my parents have said to me over the years of growing up " When we had you girls , we weren't handed a rule book" and they were so right.
Ohh sure, there are plenty of books out there , plenty of people thinking that their way is the right way and trying to bully you into changing your opinions by reading their work, but who's to say that what they are doing or what they are saying is right?
In my opinion, every child is different. Every child has a different personality and deals with situations in a different way, and as a Mother or Father, you know what is best for your own children.
Having said that, I also feel, especially having twins, that regardless of the differences in your children, you need to be consistant and stay that way.
Now, please don't think that I have a high opinion of my kids and the way they behave, because I don't , far from it. I hate to say it, but I think I am their own worst critic.
Where has this all come from you ask?
Why the terrible 2's of course!!
Max and Lacey are nearly 2 (next week) and boy don't we know it!!
I now know how spoilt we were with Stella, and at the time, were totally oblivious. She was quiet, calm, content and only ever needed to be told once.
She would go into a cupboard and I would say NO, and she would never do it again. True Story!! We never needed child locks on any cupboards until Max and Lacey began to crawl!
She followed routines and thrived on them.
She was a breeze to toilet train, and did so quite early, even for nights.
When we put her in a bed, at 19 months, we may have had one or 2 nights where she would get out and come out, not up to 70 times like we have had lately .....
Is it her personality, or our parenting style at the time?
Then came the two beautiful bundles.
Gosh they are strong willed, determined and stubborn. Where they get those attributes from I will never know ?! haha
We now have child locks EVERYWHERE, I am constantly , constantly cleaning up little messes all over the house. Bath toys scattered around, toilet rolls unravelled, and just today, a large bucket of sand all over the floor (while I was in their room putting away their clothes).
They have also made the School drop off and pick up run and absolute nightmare. Lacey is that independent that she thinks she doesn't need to hold onto the pram , nor my hand for that matter, and often runs off, just for shits and giggles. Max just wants to stay at school and play with all the cool bikes and toys!
I am sure the other Mums at school look at me and shake their head, but I hope its more of a "Oh you poor thing, I totally understand" sorta look. Either way, I am loving the school holidays and don't want them to end!
Why do they do these things?
Because I truely believe we are harder on these 2 than we ever have been with Miss 4!
I am finding it hard to take them to certain places solo. Parks, yes. Shops with trolleys, yes ( I can put them in a trolley, give them a cooler bag of food and they are happy ) but to walk into a shop?!
No way man! They would run, touch everything and just cause havok!!
Fight they do alright! Like cat and dog. Biggest LOVE/HATE relationship I have ever seen.
They play beautifully together, really care about each other ( if Lacey is given something she will always ask "Maxie?!" to be reassured that he will not miss out, or she will make sure of it!) and yet they can absolutely flog each other. They tackle, sometime bite ( so bad) and have taken to smacking. But I guess if I lived, breathed , everything with my brother or sister, I would get fed up at times too.
But I want to know why?
I am hoping its just a stage. A 'fase' that will pass and they will become the delightful little cherubs that I know they can be, and are quite often.
They certainly aren't all bad, quite the opposite, and maybe its just my high standards? But they are also the most snuggly and affectionate kids, always asking for "Cuggles".
I just never want my kids to be the kids that people hate to invite somewhere!! Hate to have over and dread what they might do or what might happen!! Not that I think it will, they don't break, aren't nasty and just like to play.
Whats the right way to discipline though? Do you smack them ? ( I am not against smacking and do smack my kids, don't judge , just sayin') but they do get numerous warnings first, its not just a first reaction. Do you do time out? Do you take away privaledges or toys? Do you just ignore and hopes it goes away?
By geez, this parenting gig is hard work! There is never going to be an ideal way to deal with a situation of discipline, but I like to think I am doing an ok job with our kids.
We still get invited places, (well sometimes) so they can't be all that bad?!
I wouldn't begrudge the Terrible Twos kindly pi**ing off though!!
Oh dear Angus, I hope you are as similiar to your big sister Stella in nature as you are in looks!
Are you hearing me? Or is it just me?
Either way, watch out when you see the crazy lady with all the kids coming! She is a woman on a mission!
And some phone snaps of their antics, just for entertainments sake , of course!!
Don't let their looks fool you!
|I found her here when I got up during the night to feed Angus. Every night for a week!!|
Ohh sweet children of mine, you keep me entertained, thats for sure!!